If you missed the part where god spelled out his commandments, you aren’t the only one; Joseph continues to prove his dim-wittedness; everyone displays an uncanny ability to tell meaningful dreams from the weird meaningless ones.
Starts off pretty uneventful; more recounting of generations which couldn’t be more pointless or boring. It picks up later though as Joseph and his colored coat first appear. Joseph proves to be a real idiot. Judah proves to be an immoral douche.
Genesis 32-34 When he’s not pointlessly naming things left and right, Jacob is busy getting busy with rent boys. Just goes to show the many ways in which the bible inspires Republican congressmen. Then things become much less funny. Really. The bible is horrible.
If you see Canaan, tell him that yes we are still mad at him for all that nothing he did; follow your dreams was meant literally back then; Jacob is living a bad porn from the 70’s…. or is it a really great one…
Sarah is dead and Abraham waits nearly 16 minutes to remarry; the venison obsessed Isaac gets himself kicked out of every town from here to Beersheba for just plain being too awesome. Don’t ask him to tell own sons apart, though.
Abraham is a murderous psychopath; God is a forgetful moron whose hobbies include asking questions he already knows the answer to, and putting people through bizarre tests of faith he already knows the results of.
Genesis gets raunchy… you won’t even believe the kind of crap that happens in this episode. Warning, the subject matter gets a little gruesome. Ok you are warned.
The bible takes a turn for the boring, but is revived by some good old fashioned polygamy. Also, I misspoke and said validify instead of validate…. I’m still feeling embarrassed.
In part 2 of indeterminable, God is on his period and decides to kill everything ever, meanwhile Noah gains favor with the lord for being completely average.
I have released the introductory podcast and episode 1. I will be releasing an episode per work day from here on out. It’s about a 45 minute podcast per day, which may be a lot for some of you, but in order to reach my goal of getting through the bible in a year, it has to be that way. Please listen and enjoy!!
Ok I just re-listened to Episode 1 and I’d just like to say that it definitely took me a minute to get used to this medium. I still think it is funny and worth listening to, but I get much better at it as I go along! So bear with me!