Well I’m back but the more important question is where were you? I was here. Waiting for you to tell me to do a podcast. Well somehow those Jews still don’t believe in Moses’s god after all the miracles and murders he has performed for them… Numbers 14-17
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God gives Moses and the Jews a few trumpets to sound whenever they are in trouble which will save them (how has that been working?); god lights a few troublemakers on fire because why not; Moses was a special needs child; BONUS! More names! YES!
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Today’s reading was very repetitive. First I read chapter 7, and it was repetitive. Then I read chapter 8, and it was repetitive. Then I read chapter 9, and it was repetitive. I read chapters 7,8, and 9, and they were very repetitive. Repetitive.
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God still seems interested in talking to Moses even though Moses brings nothing to the conversation; Moses and Co. face a devastating badger shortage; also “devastating badger shortage” is redundant.
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God rattles off punishment after punishment to expect if the chosen people decide to unchoose themselves. Meanwhile a wearied Moses wonders why he still bothers to listen to the old cook. He could have been somebody….
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This bible is so boring, even the person writing it down starting looking for other things to write about. Also if murdering kids is wrong, then the bible certainly doesn’t want to be right. And can you blame it?
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I’m BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!@$!%)#~!1`471289! This was fun. Let’s do it again next week. Oh a summary, you ask? Well not really anything happened. There was a bit about how disgusting women are after they give birth, and then a lot about leprosy. A LOT…
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If I had a dime for every time the bible repeated itself I would be one rich dude. God shamelessly murders two of his followers for nothing; I really can’t get a handle for why god sometimes just leaves crap alone, but other times he shoots to kill…
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This podcast ruled. It was so good you won’t even understand what just happened to you. Oh also nothing happened in the readings. It just went over a million different reasons to sacrifice cows. Stupid. But anyway, I was awesome.
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Starting Leviticus! Yay! It’s out of the gates fast with the great home recipes for your very own animal sacrifice! These high fat, high cholesterol sacrificial recipes will please even your most angry god, and of course the priests take their cut…
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